Letting Go.

Letting go can be hard. To end something that have been a part of you for a long time, like ending an unhealthy relationship and cut that toxic person out of your life, or if it’s about ending a bad habbit, an addiction that have controled you for far to long. It’s hard, and it might be hard for a long time, even if it makes you feel better. It will be hard to not pick up the phone and call when you miss them, to not send them a long text message about how you want them back. It will take strenght to not answer when they call, no say no and hang up on them. It will be hard when the bad things keeps on begging for your attention, it will be hard to not answer and fall right back on that road again.

Letting go can be hard, especially when it’s about letting go of something that has been a part of you for so long. When it’s about somethings that have controled you for years. But it’s important to know that falling back again, is in fact, not worth it. I’ve realised that now. After over five months I had a slip, but It’s over now. I’m finally letting go of what has been such a big part of who I am, and will always be a part of who I am. The scars of what was will always remain, but I will make sure it will stay in the past. I’m once again letting go of my biggest comfort, what I’ve always fallen back on, even if it’s just in thought. I will think about in again, I know that. But never again will I consider hurting myself like that again. Never.

Letting go can be hard, but it’s important to know that it’s for the best. For your best. Not anyone else’s. I know in my heart and I know in my head that I will be better of without it. Without this.

So, self harm, if you’re reading this;

Goodbye. I can’t say I won’t miss you, and I can’t say I will, but I can say this, never again will you get to me like you did. You are in the past for me, and that’s where you will stay. Because that’s what’s best for me.

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